To Call The Police!

George Phillips , an elderly man, from Meridian , Mississippi , was
going up to bed, when his wife told him that he’d left the light on in
the garden shed, which she could see from the bedroom window. George opened the back door to go turn off the light, but saw that there were people in the shed stealing things.

He phoned the police, who asked “Is someone in your house?”
He said “No,” but some people are breaking into my garden shed and stealing from me.

Then the police dispatcher said “All patrols are busy. You should
lock your doors and an officer will be along when one is available.”

George said, “Okay.”

Play the fool and WIN!

There once lived a great mathematician in a village outside Ujjain . He was often called by the local king to advice on matters related to the economy. His reputation had spread as far as Taxila in the North and Kanchi in the South. So it hurt him very much when the village headman told him, “You may be a great mathematician who advises the king on economic matters but your son does not know the value of gold or silver.”

The mathematician called his son and asked, “What is more valuable – gold or silver?” “Gold,” said the son. “That is correct. Why is it then that the village headman makes fun of you, claims you do not know the value of gold or silver? He teases me every day. He mocks me before other village elders as a father who neglects his son. This hurts me. I feel everyone in the village is laughing behind my back because you do not know what is more valuable, gold or silver. Explain this to me, son.”

A Difficult Judgment

In a small town, a person decided to open up his Bar business, which was right opposite to the church. The church & its congregation started a campaign to block the Bar from opening with petitions and prayed daily against his business.

Work progressed. However, when it was almost complete and was about to open a few days later, a strong lightning struck the Bar and it was burnt to the ground.

The church folks were rather smug in their outlook after that, till the Bar owner sued the church authorities on the grounds that the church through its congregation & prayers was ultimately responsible for the demise of his bar shop, either through direct or indirect actions or means.

Believe it or not …

At the 1994 annual awards dinner given for Forensic Science, AAFS, President Dr. Don Harper Mills astounded his audience with the legal complications of a bizarre death. Here is the story:
On March 23, 1994 the medical examiner viewed the body of Ronald Opus and concluded that he died from a shotgun wound to the head.
Mr.Opus had jumped from the top of a ten-story building intending to commit suicide. He left a note to that effect, indicating his despondency. As he fell past the ninth floor his life was interrupted by a shotgun blast passing through a window which killed him instantly. Neither the shooter nor the decedent was aware that a safety net had been installed just below at the eighth floor level to protect some building workers and that Ronald Opus would not have been able to complete his suicide the way he had planned.
“Ordinarily,” Dr. Mills continued, “A person who sets out to commit suicide and ultimately succeeds, even though the mechanism might not be what he intended, is still defined as committing suicide.” That Mr.Opus was shot on the way to certain death, but probably would not have been successful because of the safety net, caused the medical examiner to feel that he had a homicide on his hands.

Why Gujju people are so successful!

Bill Gates organized an enormous session to recruit a new
Chairman for Microsoft Europe.

5000 candidates assembled in a large room. One candidate is
Kantibhai Shah.

Bill Gates: Thank you for coming. Those who do not know
JAVA may leave.

2000 people leave the room.

Kantibhai says to himself, ‘I do not know JAVA but I
have nothing to lose if I stay. I’ll give it a try’

Bill Gates: Candidates who never had experience of managing
more than 100 people may leave.

2000 people leave the room.

YOU

One day not too long ago the employees of a large company in St. Louis , Missouri returned from their lunch break and were greeted with a sign on the front door.

The sign said: “Yesterday the person who has been hindering your growth in this company passed away. We invite you to join the funeral in the room that has been prepared in the gym.”

At first everyone was sad to hear that one of their colleagues had died, but after a while they started getting curious about who this person might be. The excitement grew as the employees arrived at the gym to pay their last respects.

Everyone wondered: “Who is this person who was hindering my progress? Well, at least he’s no longer here!”

Famous Sufi story: On Faith

A man just got married and was
returning home with his wife. THEY WERE CROSSING A LAKE IN A BOAT when
suddenly a great storm arose.

The man was a warrior, but the woman
became very much afraid because it seemed almost hopeless: THE BOAT WAS
SMALL AND THE STORM WAS REALLY HUGE, and any moment they were going to
be drowned. But the man sat silently, calm and quiet, as if nothing was
happening.

The woman was trembling and she said, “ARE YOU NOT
AFRAID? This may be our last moment of life! It doesn’t seem that we
will be able to reach the other shore. Only some miracle can save us;
otherwise death is certain.

Are you not afraid? Are you mad or
something? Are you a stone or something?

A Muddy Road

Tanzan and Ekido were once travelling together down a muddy road. A heavy rain was still falling.

Coming around a bend, they met a lovely girl in a silk kimono and sash, unable to cross the intersection.

“Come on, girl,” said Tanzan at once. Lifting her in his arms, he carried her over the mud.

Ekido did not speak again until that night when they reached a lodging temple. Then he no longer could restrain himself. “We monks don’t go near females,” he told Tanzan, “especially not young and lovely ones. It is dangerous. Why did you do that?”

Five Steps to become a trader recommended by all successful traders.

Step One: Unconscious Incompetence.

This is the first step you take when starting to look into trading. you know that its a good way of making money because you’ve heard so many things about it and heard of so many millionaires. Unfortunately, just like when you first desire to drive a car you think it will be easy – after all, how hard can it be? Price either moves up or down – what’s the big secret to that then – lets get cracking!

Unfortunately, just as when you first take your place in front of a steering wheel you find very quickly that you haven’t got the first clue about what you’re trying to do. You take lots of trades and lots of risks. When you enter a trade it turns against you so you reverse and it turns again .. and again, and again.

You may have initial success, and thats even worse – cos it tells your brain that this really is simple and you start to risk more money.

You try to turn around your losses by doubling up every time you trade. Sometimes you’ll get away with it but more often than not you will come away scathed and bruised You are totally oblivious to your incompetence at trading.

This step can last for a week or two of trading but the market is usually swift and you move onth the next stage.

Step Two – Conscious Incompetence

Advisory on Influenza – A (H1N1)

1. What is Influenza – A (H1N1) and what is the current situation
• Influenza – A (H1N1) is an influenza virus causing illness in people. First detected in Mexico in April, 2009, it has spread more than 168 countries in the World
• World Health Organization (WHO) has given Influenza A – H1N1 virus a pandemic alert of Phase 6. At this time, WHO considers the overall severity of the influenza pandemic to be moderate. This is based on scientific evidence as well as input from WHO Member States on the pandemic’s impact on their health systems, and their social and economic functioning.
• The moderate assessment reflects that:
 Most people recover from infection without the need for hospitalization or medical care.
 Overall, hospitals and health care systems in most countries have been able to cope with the numbers of people seeking care, although some facilities and systems have been stressed in some localities.
• As of 31st July 2009, WHO has reported 1,62,000 laboratory confirmed cases of H1N1 across 168 countries. As of 4th August 2009, India has reported 558 laboratory confirmed cases of H1N1.

2. What are the signs and symptoms of influenza-A (H1N1)?